Re: [LAU] Close, but no cigar

On Mar 31, 2017 13:09, Will Godfrey <willgodfrey@musically.me.uk> wrote:
>
> There has been much argument as to whether a graphical interface is best with
> independent windows, or with a single window (with or without tabs). Here in
> the Yoshimi workshop, the only type of arguments we like are the startup CLI
> ones! Therefore we've been working on a quite novel idea.
>
> This came about when one of our team (who still uses a CRT monitor) found that
> a cheap ionizer dramatically reduced the static discharges he kept getting. He
> quickly realised that ionization could be used to control both static
> attraction and repulsion. Thinking there must be an enhanced IT equivalent he
> hacked up some software ionization code.
>
> The idea actually worked. Damp down one window's positive charges and the
> other's negative component and they'd immediately stick together - overlapping
> (trying to balance their fields). He called this a 'Polarising Object
> Stratifier'. Making the windows repel was a bit of a problem as they tended to
> get a bit agressive and would fly right off the edges of the screen.
>
> We were a bit surprised when Mary spoke up.
>     "It's on a CRT right? So why not use an ion trap magnet?"
> We didn't know she was old enough to remember them (nobody was brave enough to
> ask her age). Then after a pause. "Everything else is software these days, so
> why not a software IoT magnet?" She was on a roll now, and seeing the disbelief
> on our faces, said, "Oh you wimps! Can't even sort out this P.O.S. I'll code it
> myself with Ada."
>
> What can I say? She built it, and it worked. However, the IoT magnet had to be
> treated with care - it wouldn't do for it to interfere with other unrelated
> systems. As the associated hardware was designed and built by most of the team
> we decided to call it the Joint Unified Node Controller.
>
> Things were going really well. Everyone thought putting P.O.S. code into IoT
> J.U.N.C. was a great idea. With some fine tuning of both electrostatic and
> magnetic fields in  windows, Bonded Ordinate Tracking 'nets' could be made to
> attach to each other as a single blob, discretely slip under to work unseen, or
> tuck themselves almost out of sight into the corners. They jiggled a bit -
> rather adding to the charm. The PR and marketing departments were ecstatic.
>
> That was yesterday.
>
> Anyone remember the thunderstorm? We'll never forget it! There was a lightning
> strike almost directly overhead.
>
> We'd left the unit on test overnight and think all those finely balanced forces
> were suddenly released, and at the same time the strength of the IoT magnet
> must have increased by many orders of magnitude. Fortunately there was nobody
> in the building. However, when we went in this morning, we were sorry to see
> the kit had sort-of imploded.
>
> That thunderstorm must have really been something. It seems to have taken out
> our ISP for several hours, though he rang me around 2am ranting about something
> called a zero day, and service denial. I told him I hadn't a clue what he was
> talking about and that I was sure he'd sort out whatever his problem was during
> the morning.

Well, I think a cigar would make an interesting musical instrument/user interface. Especially if it was filled with magical, mystical herbs. ;)
 
David W. Jones
gnome@hawaii.rr.com
authenticity, honesty, community
http://dancingtreefrog.com
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Received on Sat Apr 1 08:15:02 2017